Often when I've had the conversation about first impressions with friends, I have been told that I "looked nice" when they first met me. Haha, little did they know that lil Cita has so much under that sweet innocent face... Just kidding. (a lil bit)
As sassy or tough or nerdy or airheaded or loving as I am on the inside, my countenance tends to be welcoming and ... well, just nice. I hardly get into fights, I'll just yell many-a-random exasperation and give lots of attitude here and there. I don't get very evil when you go deep; I just get honestly tough if you ask for it.
Soooooooo, as a result, fights are uncomfortable for me. Very uncomfortable. I'm not good at it. At times I even forget what I'm arguing about or lose my point even when it's clear as day that what I'm saying makes sense and that I'm right (which I always am, of course).
However, I recently learned the value of a good fight. Sometimes, we just need to fight it out because bottling it all up never keeps humans together...it just leads to the explosion of radical confusion. Fight or flight? Which to choose?
If you think about it, fighting is what keeps people together. I can take every single elder Cuban couple that I know for an example....they can't breathe for five minutes without yelling at the love of their life. A common phrase my grandparents use when arguing is "pero mi vida, ... [blahblaharguement]!!!!" which means, "but my love, ... [blahblaharguement]!!" They are calling each other their love while yelling so intensely that the poor kitty next door is crying.
The only people that I actually fight with is my family, and that's never been an issue to me.
Now that I think about it ....if we didn't, that'd be one messed up family. Holding things in, especially in family, can be so bad. I can comfortably fight with them, and it's probably one of the way we stay together....we fight and somehow can move on from it.
Being naturally nice, as easy as it is for me, can be such a dreadful evil in having a wholesome life. I recently experienced that fighting it out is wonderful way to grow and sometimes brings people closer together.
Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely still a fan of yelling in exasperation and exclaiming randomly when I can't form my thoughts correctly...however, I hope to grow in the skill of properly fighting and making up.
Fight or flight? May I choose the fight for the make-up.
Have you fought with someone today? Jk, but seriously..
~Esa Cita
as long as in the end, you win hearts. winning the argument is nice, but it's the heart that we desire :)
ReplyDeletecheck it- 1 peter 3:15-16 i think
You are nice (:
ReplyDeleteI am the same way. I hate fighting with people, I am terrible at it and it makes me so uncomfortable.... and yet... I fight with my family all the time. Ryan and I bicker constantly, but we are so quick to make up and move on that it really isn't an issue. We're two very different people so we disagree, a lot, but we love eachother and that makes it easy to compromise and go beyond petty things.
Keep the love flowin' girl. There is plenty to go around!